Dating a girl 8 years older than me

Originally Posted by inb4umirin. Originally Posted by deadliftbrah I date men 20 years younger than me. Many Miscers on here have posted that they are dating women in their 40s.

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  • Would you date a girl 7 years older than you if shes a solid 8/10? - Forums.

Have you been in a cave? Dating older women is the hot new thing. The only negative is that she may want to have a baby NOW and you're not ready. I have a tough time believing that she hasn't had sex in 5 years, and that the only guy she was with was her ex-husband. I look at many factors aside from physical appearance but 7 years isn't a big deal to me. The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it. Do it op for many reasons She can cook, experienced sexually, beewbs, op may not have to be a phaggot, can probably get your credit up, finance a new truck, dump her for 20 year old in 5 years for profit???

Date sure, settle down with no. In 5 years she will be That's old as fuk cuzzz and she won't look 25 then. She'd be 50 and in menopause. Not about blowing the dust off the poosey. If she has all the qualities in a woman you desire, go for it. I'm a little concerned about her sex drive though Attraction and keeping the girl chasing you - http: I love my older women because of their life experience and better than average sheet skills.

However, in your case, tread carefully! Divorced 5 years and didn't fuark anybody?? Yeah right bro, she is in her sexual prime and jonesing for that cawk. She is lying and trying to come off as a good girl to keep you around due to age difference. I would have laughed in her face when she said that to me. What are your relations with the other women in your life?

How heavily do you weight youth and appearance in general? Are you freaked out by the idea of growing old?

Do you have friends who are older than you? How big a deal is appearance? Again, the guys who have the most successful long-term relationships are guys for whom emotional and intellectual compatibility are the more important parts of a relationship - they're physically attracted to their partners, but in general they need emotional and intellectual compatibility in order to want to have a serious relationship - in their past dating lives, they were not drawn to beautiful but stupid women, or beautiful women with diametrically opposite values to theirs.

Do you - even semi-consciously - rely on your partner as a source of status? Do you feel like you need to have a beautiful woman on your arm to be at ease with other men? No matter how lovely your partner is, if you're this type of guy you will one day be in a situation where it's high-status to have a much younger partner. Will you still care for your current partner at that point, or will you want to replace her so that you can fit in? These are some things I'd ask myself. If you have a history of knowing yourself and making good decisions, and if you feel confident in your heart, I don't think age is a serious concern.

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My former supervisor was 7 years older than her husband, who moved from western Canada to Connecticut to marry her they met on vacation in the Bahamas and did the long-distance relationship for a couple years. They have no kids she married in her mids, I think, and felt she was "too old" to have them but they have lots of nieces and nephews and pets.

I don't think the age difference is a problem. I do think her failure to commit to you is a problem. Perhaps she fears the age difference as she says - or perhaps she doesn't think you are the right one for her and she is making a convenient excuse. You've been together for almost a year now.

Man eight years younger than woman. Will this work? - older dating long | Ask MetaFilter

Give it as much time as you feel the situation warrants. Time is certainly on your side. At some point you will need to make a decision to move on to someone who will commit to you. Make that clear to her and go on with your life. I am 11 years older than my husband. I'm female, despite my username. We met when he was 23 and I was 34, married three years later after spending our first year apart while he was deployed.

I can tell you that age has nothing well, very little to do with it. It is all about maturity and communication skills. My husband is mature for his age and the first year of our relationship was spent solely on the phone. We did nothing but verbally communicate and it was a great way to get to know each other really well. He was not a typical 23 year old much like yourself and was ready to settle down. I think the key here is for both of you to understand that your moving to Beijing is just another step in your relationship.

You say that you'll compromise by settling down earlier than you had planned. I don't think that's a good way to look at it. You will want to settle down when you meet the right woman, regardless of how old you are. Long distance relationships are extremely difficult and it's hard to know the day to day person until you live in the same city. My husband returned from his deployment and despite being on the phone constantly while he was away, we were together for six months before getting engaged, and then another six months before getting married.

Ask her to please just let you take this leap of faith for the two of you and don't make any future plans beyond that. Not saying to plan on it failing, but take it one step at a time. I have a friend who married a woman some years older when he was about At the time we age-peers raised eyebrows at the match because 30 seemed "old" oh, how dumb we were , but they have been married for about a decade now, and she gave birth to their second child 6 months ago. Their first daughter is about 8 years old. They seem very happy. I'd wait for marriage until you're 25, though. I wouldn't date anyone younger than 25 because, though adult, they haven't truly grown into themselves yet.

It will make you a better partner. The people I know who jump from living-with-parents to living-with-SO no solo experience with responsibility have the worst time. The older partner with more adult life experience may become frustrated with the younger, who has not had the opportunity to learn those lessons. Also, the only time I think about our age difference is along the lines of "gee, I've been driving for 23 years now and he's only been driving for nine. I don't think an 8 year age difference is a per se a problem.

I am 8 years younger than my girlfriend I am also a woman , and it has never caused even a slight problem. We tease each other about it occasionally - but it's really a total non-issue. I know I wasn't ready to make a life-long commitment at 23, and the vast majority of people are also not ready at that age. You may be different, but that would make you an outlier. She might be afraid that you will move to Beijing and resent her if it doesn't work out, or if things are difficult for you. That can be a pretty hard fear to work through. My younger current partner made a huge compromise in order to be with me, and while we are very happy now, there was a really tense period of insecurity when I was afraid that any piece of misfortune or a particularly bad argument would confirm for him that he made the wrong choice.

This is probably what she's worried about. And as the product of an unstable childhood myself, I can tell you that the fear of disapproval and then abandonment by the people you love is real and runs deep no matter how together you may look or feel. You sound extremely mature and adaptable for your age, but you're right that this is a big move for a relationship. This could be great, but before you think about settling down and having children: Are you okay with that? At 31, she likely has a time frame for when she would like to start a family.

Would you date a girl 7 years older than you if shes a solid 8/10?

Ask her to communicate this with you, and then for the love of everything let her go with plenty of time to move on if you're not feeling it. These are some of the things you two need to work out together before you make this move. Maybe talking through the worst case scenarios will reassure you both that you're willing to take the risks as long as your eyes are open.

It sounds like you love her and you want to be with her. If you're in a comfortable enough position to make this move, then I say go for it on a trial basis. Age is part of it, though at the risk of sounding condescending, you come across as a smart and wise year-old or at least a whole lot smarter and wiser and more accomplished than I and a lot of people were at the age of Can you do fine professionally in Beijing or if things with her do not go well or leave relatively quickly and take the financial hit and do fine elsewhere?

If so, hard to see what's lost in giving it your best shot. Me thinks you'd always regret it if you don't. Bid red flags that have nothing to do with who you are: You may be great together. You may well be great together again when she works through some of these things. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a wonderful time in your life being left as just that A good situation needs not achieve its maximum potential to still be fulfilling and a positive in both of your lives.

I would give it some time. You owe it to both of you. And if you end up being together in the end As you know, it's a big fascinating world out there. You will probably encounter lots of great pieces of it. Almost all of the issues you bring up are definitely potential problems.

They don't have to be deal breakers, but they do need to be addressed honestly and openly between the two of you. I think the "when you're older you may change your mind" is something you probably shouldn't dismiss out of hand. You probably should admit it to yourself, at least, that yes, this could be a possibility -- and what if?

That goes into the list of "things we need to address honestly and openly". My now-wife of 15 years this past October is a year and a half older than me.

Dating a girl 8 years younger than you

Also, keep in mind there's nothing that says you absolutely have to get married next week or next month or next year. Age in relation to childbearing for her may be an issue, but Age can be an issue, but as issues go it's almost certainly not the most important one. From her point of view, it's not how you feel now that matters, it's how you will feel in 5 or 10 years. From a 31 year-old's perspective, 23 is still an age where you're figuring out who you are.

If you get to 27 and suddenly decide your life's ambition is to be a merchant marine, she doesn't want to left feeling like she invested 4 years for nothing. You may not see yourself that way, but that doesn't prove anything. There's also the issue of relative aging. When you're 35 and she's 43, will you still be attracted to her?

Idealism says yes, paranoia says probably not. I tend to think these things can work. I had a 3 year relationship with a woman 14 years older than me. The things that drove us were not age issues and we are still very good friends. Oh, and please don't say "trial basis" because it sounds cold. The age difference isn't the problem, but your youth might be. Based on my experience: There's a LOT of growing that happens there.

In 7 years, you will be an utterly different person from who you are now. She will likely be a very similar person to who she is now. This might mean that it doesn't work out, or maybe you'll be an even better fit. Either way, no one knows the future: Completely true--if she's the one, do it; at 22 I didn't want to settle down for ten more years, and then I met my older wife and wanted to be married and have babies with her, like, yesterday. One bit of advice: That's taking it to another level that already presumes a serious commitment, makes you have to deal with more issues than you should have to right away before the relationship's cemented and she's somewhat older and likely more set in her ways and flexibility is a key to sharing a home together successfully , and might make breaking it off harder than it needs to be if it's not working out i.

The uniqueness of living in a foreign city ought to keep you pretty well together enough as it is without having to share a house together right away. Happily married 14 years with a nine year old child she had at age The only time it's an issue is when I make a pop culture reference and she doesn't get it. I've long since stopped expecting her to catch my Simpsons quotes and she knows I'm not going to recognize any John Denver lyrics that aren't about sunshine on shoulders. As some others have said, I would be more concerned about the age you're at now.

I was 27 when I got married to her. If you're a mature 23 years old and you're absolutely sure what The Rest Of Your Life means, go for it. The age difference is not the problem. What she is saying she feels is the problem. The breakup may take another 6 months or a year to complete, but she started it yesterday. That said, the progression of your relationship 2 weeks to serious dating! Not impossible to maintain fast, but, well, Really Fast.

Check out this TED Talk by Scott Stanley called Sliding vs Deciding, and it might give you some perspective on how this relationship has unfolded so far. I'll give you a hint, she is correct that breaking up before the big travel happens is much easier than after, in many ways. I don't think the age factor is actually the main issue here for what it's worth, I've seen older-woman-younger-man relationships go both ways; one couple I know is happily married and I often forget that they are not close in age, while another couple is constantly fighting because they are obviously at very different stages in their life and do not seem to want the same things.

The main issue seems to be that you're compromising everything for this relationship she seems to be compromising nothing at all. If you truly want to make these compromises, great! But if it feels like a compromise, rather than a decision your are making happily, then odds are good that you will eventually come to resent her for "making" you change so much of your life plan. Sure, relationships require a lot of compromise, but they also require approximately equal give and take.

It doesn't sound like your relationship is equal in this regard. Plus, there is the fact that, as bilabial points out, it doesn't particularly sound like she wants to be in this relationship anyway, even if she hasn't explicitly said so. I'm 10 years younger than my wife, and the age hasn't been much of an issue besides gentle ribbing over what was popular culture when we were kids.

You start by asking about the age-difference, but then describe a whole lot of problems that exist in couples regardless of age. Put the 'age difference' in your back pocket, as a nice clean thing to blame if the relationship fails; if you want to address the real situation at hand, look at the actual issues causing you to both rethink your future plans together. You can get over them, but if you treat it like age is the issue -- something neither of you can control -- you're not going to fix or recognize the true problems.

My 28 year old cousin met and married her husband when he was 22 and they've been together for 15 years now and have three kids. So the age difference in and of itself isn't necessarily a problem. I'm not sure "you might not be interested anymore in a few years" has to do with how she feels about you personally so much as you in the abstract. It seems totally reasonable for her to be acutely aware that women in general have a much shorter window in which men in general find them attractive. Whether she's going to continue to be anxious about it could be an issue, and it would indeed be a good idea to subject yourself to some serious and potentially painful self-examination on this subject, as Frowner suggested.

But I'm not sure she's going to be able to get over it either. Or maybe she's afraid she'll never be able to break up with you because you've invested so much. She's afraid and the only way you can reassure her is to act steadfastly as you say you will. It sounds like you want to do that but make sure you do. And make sure she actually wants you, not just a guy now that she's It's one of those internet observations that goes from being "this is sort of true a lot of the time mostly because of [SOCIAL FACTORS] and there are lots and lots of exceptions" to being "this is an iron-clad rule that derives from our biology and applies to everyone so suck it up ladies".

And the more it gets repeated as if it were an inherent truth, the more "truthful" it becomes - it acquires the force of a truth because everyone decides to believe it.

Fresh kids, fresh style, fresh spirit

Totally agree with AzraelBrown. Based on her history and beliefs, she wants an older guy because that means that there's a higher chance that he'll want to settle and is ok with settling which is not always true of course. You can try to convince her otherwise until you're blue in the face, but what she believes is what she believes. I think the question for both of you right now is, are you at a point in your lives, and in your relationship, where you are ready to commit to each other, for life?

It sounds like no, based on what you say here: She wants to settle down. For her, you're not it, and possibly, the relationship is not it. Age might be one of many reasons why she's having doubts, there might be other reasons maybe having to do with you, maybe having to do with her.

Put aside the age gap in your conversations and see where you land at the end of those discussions. We originally met when he was 18 years old and he was attending a fan club convention that I was co-hosting. At that time I remember thinking he was nice and seemed very intelligent and more mature than most year-old guys I'd known, but nevertheless I still thought of him as a "kid. Then four years after we'd first met we went together with three other friends on a trip to England for a fan club convention. The love is obviously there and they look absolutely stunning together. I think it depends.

My friend is devastated because she cannot be a biological mother and she cannot give him a child. He cares so much about her health and he doesn't want her to receive all these crazy treatments. They are looking for options to adopt. I think this kind of relationship perhaps will work. Not every guy who is attracted to older woman has mommy issues. I like older men because I think men in their 30s are super sexy, both physically and emotionally of course there is always exception I have never thought about dating a younger man, but I adore my girlfriend's relationship because this much younger guy makes her so happy.

So go for it. Originally Posted by DenisFilS. I think you're too young to get married; doesn't matter how would the woman is. My Uncle married a woman that was 16 yrs older. They are still together today. Don't let anyone tell you what to do in life just take suggestions. Don't let the age thing bother you, just spend a great deal of time talking about what each of you want out of the relationship if and when the time comes that you both decide to get serious. Not that big of a difference. At least you will both die about the same time. Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum.

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If she looks younger than her actual age?? Now she says she is "too busy" , Relationships, replies She's at least 10 years older than me She is older than me for 8 years,but I love her! View detailed profile Advanced or search site with. Page 1 of 3.