Dating a man in the military can be one of the most rewarding experiences you could ever endure. For one, you have the pride of dating someone who is selflessly offering their service to the country they love. That kind of dedication speaks wonders for how your military man might treat you.
However, there are some definite drawbacks to dating someone in the military. This dedication to their country has drawn you to them, but it could also be the thing that draws you far apart emotionally and geographically. If you are currently or are considering becoming romantically involved with someone who is currently enlisted in the military, it is important that you consider that their desire to be with you does not come first.
Once someone has enlisted in the military, they cannot simply shirk their responsibilities later. Alhough the physical distance between the two of you can be rough, the joy of being reunited after a tour away is enough to make it all worth it. However, if you are considering dating someone in the military, get ready for heartache. As wonderful as it feels to see your military man when he comes back, it is going to hurt tenfold when they have to leave again.
It is not always the case that dating someone in the military means sacrificing your ability to keep in contact with them at all while they are gone. No, you will not have the comfort and convenience of civilian relationships where you usually live in the same city or at least the same country and have access to communications. In the military, soldiers are sent to far and remote places that most of us would never dream of going to.
While this may make it difficult to keep in contact, it is not impossible. It is often possible to talk via phone, Internet, or postal mail with your beau, no matter how many thousands of miles you are apart. Women often move to be closer to someone in uniform. These women don't have a job, no savings account, and no education, not anything. When the relationship goes sour, they are left feeling used and abused.
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Please don't do this. Use this time to make sure you are on solid ground. Finish your education or make sure you have solid work skills and credentials. Start saving your own money because you are sadly mistaken if you think Uncle Sam will take care of you.
1. Don't forget the man inside the uniform.
This is not true. There is no Uncle Sam, and if there were, he doesn't know who you are. Vicki, I'm 22 years old, and this is my first time being in a relationship with a man in the military. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. You May Also Like. Soldier on Leave But Parents Won't Bend Rules A soldier's girlfriend doesn't get much time with him and resents her parents' strict rules at home. A spouse worries when her husband pulls away in the months prior to their first deployment.
A couple was reunited after seven months. Then he gave her a venereal disease.
She's furious and doesn't know what to do. They can be tough for people in the most exclusive, committed relationships. It can mess with your self-esteem and sense self-worth.
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You need to know who you are. Have interests, hobbies, and friends. If your whole identity is wrapped up solely in your service member, it is going to be a tough, lonely life. Honestly, I think these are good things to think about before entering into any relationship— no matter the affiliation to the military. Of course, you might have to modify them a bit, but the basic gist is there.
I was married but separated from my ex at the time. I am now divorced with 2 small kids. Before he left we were dating for about 5 months. We fell in love, he supported me through the divorce, we shared I Love Yous and cried before he left.
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We talk or text through a WiFi app everyday. But now he has orders that is on the other end of the US when his deployment is over. He asked me and the kids to move with him, I would in a heart beat because I love him and he makes me so happy, but my kids. I dont know if we are on our way to marriage but he says he dosent want to be without me.
That is such a tough, sticky situation. I have not been in your shoes, so I may not be much help. I think thanks to Hollywood a lot of people romanticize being with a military man, but it is hard work.
I found this to be very honest and insightful! Thanks so much for doing it!