We keep meeting new people, exploring our options, only to realize that despite the number of options, we're still lonely inside.
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I find that the more advanced and open we've become, the more we've gone far from the idea of love. If you love, you lose. Your brain has tricked your heart into not feeling properly because no one wants to be a loser here. Going to find love, means opening up to the idea of getting rejected and ending up with a broken heart.
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No one wants to deal with that mess. But the problem is that we don't want to be single either. We want to be anything but committed and we definitely don't want to be single.
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Hence, we come up with our own model of relationships which works on a strict rule of ambiguity. We're all 'in talks' with someone at a given point of time. At times, it is more than just one person. This 'fling' means we're not single but the untagged nature of it means we're not committed either.
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We're always looking for greener pastures and more experience. When we're not into a person any more, we just take a non-breakup route and ghost them. No questions asked, no apologies given. In a world where we're so used to everything happening quickly, be it ordering a pizza or finding a partner for the night, we're scared of anything long-term.
The validation of a match, the thrill of witty first messages and the excitement of having so many options just a swipe away is somehow getting the better of our emotional selves.
Is The Hook-Up Culture Along With Our Fear Of Love Turning Us Into A Lonely Generation?
Rather than investing ourselves in just one relationship, we gravitate towards relationships that are shallow. Our generation has started treating relationships like a tug of war.
Never texting first, never tell them how you actually feel, replying late for leverage and a whole bunch of mind games have really just transformed the foundation of a relationship from love to a clear power struggle. We believe that expressing our real feelings will somehow take away from our power in the relationship. And after always keeping an emotional distance and closing ourselves off to the idea of long-term romance, we wake up one fine night at 3 AM to ask ourselves why can't we just have someone to go back to every single day.
The solution to that question is really just simple: Open yourself up emotionally and also to the possibility that you may get hurt.
14 Struggles Of Being A Romantic In 2016 Hookup Culture
Keep your ego and power struggle aside. The world will make you believe that your desire for a relationship is unhealthy — a product of you being unhappy on your own. The more we rely on the Internet to date for us, the harder it is to really connect with someone. Since when was the most romantic thing in the world a phone call, or a night outside drinking and talking without phones? When people think hookups are the standard and dates are the exception everything seems ambiguous at the beginning.
You have so much to give. You know you have so much to give. Nothing terrifies me more than being so close to someone and then watching them become a stranger again. Why is this so accurate.
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All i want is to be in a happy, uncondutional, commited relationship where we say all the meaningful, heartfelt things in a room alone — just enjoying eachothers company. Like i dont want to write it all in a 10 paragraph Facebook status for everyone to see, as it looses meaning and becomes so much less intimate.