Then I had to start speaking Yiddish again.
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Is it cool for me to go out of my way never to run into her, and have to deal with this? You know, run away from my problems. I absolutely abhor it, and definitely advocate against it if it can be avoided, and if you can overcome issues like this. People within the relationship will start discussing your issues, and everyone will have an opinion.
No matter what, someone will break that golden code, and then it gets messy. When me and my inner circle GF called it quits, it automatically set up a tumultuous situation for those left in the aftermath of our relationship ground zero. I knew their issues, because they both spoke to me in confidence. I care about them enough to be real and make sure their common best interest is upheld.
What would you do? What would you tell our friend above? What did you think of my response? Please evaluate and retaliate WaltClydefrazierRap. I once had a friend in college whose breakup ripped up the whole fam- almost pitting the boys against the girls. Dude was cheating bringing new girl over to the boys house and a few of the girls who dated those boys over there knew and did not say anything.
Even some of the boys who knew the girl in question longer and closer never said a word. Once the girl found out and it came to light who also knew, they were dead to her. The family was scorched- then she started questioning all the homies around her, including myself and we stopped being friends because of all the mess… SMH. Never, never, never again…. Kinda of in a similar situation. If she gets mad then she was just using you as a link to him. Not only that when the outer circle dating pool seems to be getting cold the first thing most ask is if your friend knows any nice people.
The best and worst parts of dating from your friend group
Streetz, you're driiiving and thriiving, swooping and hooping with this post. Had a situation like that back in high school. This new girl transferred to our school. She just happen to pick our lunch table to sit at.
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My female best friends informed me that she liked me so we started dating. We ended up breaking up because she cheated on me multiple times. However, since she was good friends with my friends, I had to see her everywhere we went. And I hated this chick. I mean, everytime I saw a shooting star, I wished for one thing. Not the well-being of Africa. Not for Gucci Mane to use chapstick for once in his life. No, I wished for my ex girlfriend to get visciously mauled to death by a pod of dolphin.
I had them first.
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Why should I leave? So things were extremely awkward and drama filled from the break up until graduation. The way I figure, you MUST be the epitome of evil if the happiest most adorable creature in all the animal kingdom wants to do harm to you. Dang, I know it's messed up what happened, but the way you put what your one wish was had me cracking up. Inner circle dating is not recommended… But what about when you've dated the person for so long that they build genuine ties with those close to you?
Anyway, being a middle [wo]man, I have learned… You're going to be a good friend to one, and inevitably a bad friend to the other. I got stuck in a situation like that between my best friend and her bf who was my closest male friend at the time. Whenever they had a problem, HE would come to me asking me a whole bunch of questions and for advice.
When things went down and he got mad at me for withholding information, everyone would say I was not riding the fence… But there was no fence for me to ride. At the end of the day, SHE was my best friend. And HE was putting me in an awk situation by venting to me knowing she's my bff and asking me all these questions. I have also been on the other side.
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Another bff is close to my ex. They were close friends when I met them.
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Have known them both for 10 years. Dated my ex for 8 years on and off… Till we broke up like 2 years ago. I get anxiety attacks when I even hear about my ex. And for them not to tell him my business under any circumstances. And I am happy to say that they have kept their words to me. They give me vague answers whenever I ask how he's doing. Or claim they "don't know.
This way, no one gets involved and becomes a messenger. If anyone did, I'd have to cut them off right along with him. Im an advocate of tough love. Someone like that I would have to drag before a mirror and force them to take a good hard look at their own feelings.
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Because if you are so heavily and frequently inquiring about an ex then CLEARLY there are more feelings pent up in you than you are willing to admit too. But if they had a serious relationship going….. The ex-girlfriend, even if she means well, is selfishly putting her friend in a bad situation. When someone chooses to have no contact with you, you have to accept that they no longer want you privy to the details of their life. A little tough love from the mutual friend may be in order.
I'm not a licensed professional therapist and I'm not a relationship expert. You may want to see professional help and ask someone more qualified to seriously help you.
Inner Circle Dating and the friends caught in the crossfire
I've dealt with this with my cousin and her husband. I did give my opinions to both of them once or twice and that was it. If anything I tell my friends Not to involve outside people in your relationships……try to work it out amongst yourselves First. Outside people and their opinions tend to complicate things and make them harder than what they have to be. I'm also a simplistic person when it comes to problem solving. My bestie and I were romantically compatible from the start. You know how just because you love your friends deeply, some of them might not make the best roommates? Dating is a little like that.
They might have been to dinners and holidays with you already, or even if you live far from your parents, you may have mentioned their name at least once. You know that part of planning a date where you have to think about what that person might be into—rock-climbing or a movie? This is crucial for taking the next step into an intimate relationship because you already know there is chemistry and mutual admiration for adventure.
Introducing your significant other to your group of friends can be daunting. Your friends are so tight knit with all this history, and this person is on the outside of the inside jokes. Having someone new introduced to your squad as your romantic interest is totally different than bringing up a new relationship with someone already in the squad. This could be considered a pro or a con…. Having been there for each other through the tough breakups, we appreciate our special relationship even more. It can be a great thing to bring a relationship to the next level.